Nice package detail

The inside lining of a plain brown box.

My mother 's refrigerator still has several ancient bottles  of sparkling wine.  I doubt any of it is still drinkable but I wish I had time to open some of them to find out.

Alas.

No Traffic

I am completely surprised by the lack of traffic we had driving into Atlanta today. I must remember this next year after the fourth of July.  I can only assume Independence Day means a lot of people travel out of the city to the beach or other parts less crowded. 

Good news!

My other manager had a change of heart and now I will be off work for a few days to join MonsterMustDie while he is working in Atlanta Wednesday, July 6 to Saturday morning, July 9.

Right after I got the news of my time off, I had more good news of a visit by B&G to Winston-Salem this week on a business trip. We got to meet up with them and a few business associates at Sweet Potatoes Restaurant in Winston-Salem. It was an absolute joy to see them. They're both looking good and their chums from work were interesting people as well.

MonsterMustDie will be working for Buzzi Boutique. We're taking just one car and, depending on if he needs the car for work errands or not, I might need the help of friends to get around town.

Still, being in Atlanta even without a car will be a good break from NC. I hope some friends will have time to hang out. I'll have the entire day free while MonsterMustDie is working. Early evenings, he will be available for dinner or other socializing as long as he can get his beauty rest before work in the morning.

falling down

MonsterMustDie has a business trip to Atlanta in mid-July and we are invited to an Atlanta wedding in early September. I am still trying to take time off work to go with john in July to Atlanta but it looks like I will never be able to leave home again.

The job that I want the most that is near home and not as physically damaging, which I'm still training for has given me the time off already to go with him to Atlanta. They only give me two or three half days a week, anyway, at this point. I work 8 to 12 hours there.

The other job has not given me the time off. In a dick move, when I requested the days off for MonsterMustDie's trip to Atlanta, my manager cut my schedule to only one day a week and put that day smack in the middle of MonsterMustDie's trip. He's also not, at this point in time, giving me time off for the wedding. I would quit that job if I was not so desperate for work. Now, I've got to try to work my way up in his good graces (probably completing forklift training) if I want to get on a better schedule again. Retail jobs do not care about employee retention. There is always a new crop of employees to come in the next month. They have never given me the time off I’ve requested, no matter how far in advance I've asked for it with the exception of the times I was taking care of my mother and going to her funeral. I am surprised they didn't fire me in October or February but they kept me on board then. 

I put in two applications at a bank for Customer Assistance jobs but was turned down for both jobs this week. These were jobs that only require a high-school diploma and I was turned down for them. By email. No interview or human to speak to. 

Meanwhile, my tenant is leaving the midtown condo and moving in with her boyfriend and the condo is somehow infested with fleas. None of the neighbors have a flea infestation and she has no pets. I am hoping that the infestation disappears when the condo is empty. I suspect something is going on with all the clutter she has in there - every closet is bulging with her stuff and the living room stays jam packed with all sorts of things. It borders on looking like a hoarder's home, which makes any pest control treatments very ineffective. She's had Orkin in twice to treat the condo and Cindi has helped her do several treatments of diatomaceous earth.

I would love to be back in Atlanta. I would love to visit friends and family and go to the occasional baby shower or wedding. Things would seem sunnier to me if only my manager would give me the days off my inconsistent schedule that I requested or if my favorite job was giving me 3 or 4 full days of work each week so I could just have one easy job close to home.

MonsterMustDie makes all the money and all the decisions about the house and yard. I sit at home, unable to do anything, and stew in my own juices most days. He gets to travel occasionally for work (I know - not a pleasure trip) or social activities (pleasure trip) and I have to stay here so I can work for 6 hours to pay for email, cell phone, and car. I am losing the battle to keep all of those things that keep me minimally functional as a human being. I have no life here. I hate it here. I am trying so hard and constantly having the world slam down on me and making me start over again and again with no friends or support network.

dreams

I dreamed we were back in Atlanta, driving around. We were trying to meet up with Macabre Puppets master but MonsterMustDie kept taking us in the opposite direction from where the GPS said we needed to be. At some point, we ate lunch at a Mexican restaurant in L5P. I found an abandoned shopping bag filled with Easter toys and candy. I couldn't find the owner and didn't want to throw it away or try to return it to a store so I gave all the candy and toys away to random children I saw.

We ended up in the home of a couple in an old house. They living room was filled with Victorian parlor tricks. One of the guests at the gathering in their home was a local character and fortune teller. She said I was a martyr.

There was a life-size full-color photo art wall mural that was a portrait of Lindsay, sitting in an Edwardian chair. She was dressed in a black Victorian dress and the photo was a bondage image with her feet and hands bound to the chair with rope. Her mouth was completely hidden behind a black lace scarf that bound her head to the chair.

The mouth of Hades has opened

It is oppressive hot in North Carolina this week.  Walking outside immediately feels like a hot wet blanket has been thrown onto me.

In the good news,  the native asters I got from Cindi two years ago are finally blooming and they're gorgeous.

Garden Day

Big day for planting the edible forest at Buzzi USA. I stopped by before work to take a look.

Drainage problems

Some of the plants on the hillside have died.  This explains why.  They are sitting in underground clay bowls.

Stress

Not a good week for internet, tv, or radio. I think I need to put myself into a media blackout until next week is over. Not just because I have no mother for the first time this coming Mother's Day weekend (she blew me off for the last two years of her life to have dinner with friends) but I feel like I am further disconnected from all the Mothers in family and friends this year. Every add is Mother's day. Every commercial website has a huge Mother's Day banner featuring gifts for the woman in honor or photos of fun gatherings of family.

I expect a good general media black-out of a week to improve my overall view of humanity as well. The world is so much better first-hand than it is at a distance. My ever-changing work schedule is causing me a great deal of anxiety this week as well. Social anxiety is hitting me more than usual as well when I have to speak with other humans in formal conversations over the phone. There are job interviews I want to try to get into but my schedule makes it nearly impossible with this dance I am trying so hard to do to stay active and employed at low-paying gigs that do not pay enough to support anyone. It's pocket change for my car and phone and nothing more.

I need new underwear. I need new glasses.

On top of that, I got news yesterday that my condo in Atlanta is now infested with what is probably bed-bugs that came in luggage from a business trip. I have my people (real estate agent & manager) on it. They've tried two exterminator visits from Orkin without success and now are trying diatomaceous earth.

Homesick

Had four days off in a row last week. Probably the last four days off together that I will have in a long time. Took advantage of the time and drove down to Atlanta to visit friends, family, and places I love. Never enough time to do all I want to when I am in town. Working my two part time retail  jobs a few hours every day this week. Four hours here. Six hours there. 

Without my mother living anymore, it occurs to me that I can just leave my cell phone off all night because there is no one who needs to phone me in an emergency or with any important questions anymore. 

I only use the phone as a clock and a navigator now. 

Got home from orientation and my next door neighbor is building a privacy fence between our houses, leaving her place cut off from ours. It seems funny to me that this is happening just a month after we had the street-side fence removed from our back yard, opening our view to the neighborhood and increasing the amount of sunlight coming into the yard. Now we are being boxed in on the other side. People in High Point greatly value their privacy and solitude. Me, not so much. Oh, well... 

Back in Atlanta for a visit

First stop - lunch at Lee's Bakery on Buford Highway.  I had a delicious tofu Bahn Mi and avocado smoothie. 

I am the Ivy Fairy (Ivy Ninja).

Gift from a neighbor for whittling her English ivy down to size.
I enjoy cutting vines off of trees because seeing trees burdened down by the heavy green stuff chafes me. 

Saturday in Greensboro

We started the day at the corner farmer's market, followed by lunch at Sticks & Stones.