Dreaming

Dreamed of J.Paul last night.  We were doing things out of town while staying in a huge old house of an older southern society lady and her husband.  I was counting how many rooms had fireplaces and trying to avoid faux pas. Jae was keeping me on my toes.

memorial

We drove straight to the memorial service at the Lutheran church, late, and sat in the last row in back while the rain poured outside. After the officiants finished their part, one by one, friends and family came up to share their memories about J. Paul. There was a table in front with photos of her and Brad's wedding and a great old photo of J. and her son, Jake, when he was still small. Must have been a holiday portrait. There was a ceramic urn with dragonflies on it. People whose businesses she encouraged and helped set up spoke. Old friends spoke. Her older brother spoke through tears.

After the service, the few of us from Women's Night group of friends met up for a couple of hours at The Imperial. We drank, snacked, and shared our own personal and shared memories of Jae.

We drove back to North Carolina after that because MonsterMustDie insisted in sleeping in his own bed after two weeks in Chicago. Thankfully, he drove while I mostly slept in the (no airbag) passenger seat. We got in a little after 10pm.

I must not think bad thoughts.

It's been a crazy month, starting with a co-worker backing into my car at the end of a work day, followed by his insurance declaring my car totalled. I could get not-quite-enough to fix my ugly old car and keep it under a "salvage" title or get twice as much, which would help with a down payment on a new car. I've decided it's time to let go of my 2007 Honda Civic and try to find an affordable newer used car to replace it. I need a car that is road-worthy enough for trips out of town, mostly to Atlanta for visits, and this car is past that now. The insurance company will pick up the car on Monday. I'll have a rental car for up to 12 days while I shop for a new car, which I can't buy until 1. I get paid for my old car by the insurance company and 2. I have someone to go car shopping with so I don't get stomped on by car salepeople. 

MonsterMustDie has been in Chicago for two weeks now, working. He comes home tomorrow night.

My friend Jae's memorial service is this Saturday morning in Conyers, Georgia. I tried to get off work at both jobs to go down on Friday for it but was only able to get time off my weekend part-time job for it. My full-time job has been too busy this month to give me an extra day to make the drive down. Instead, I'll be hitting the road around 4:00 a.m. on Saturday. Because he will be home by then, MonsterMustDie wants to come with me to the memorial for Jae but he is insisting on driving straight back to North Carolina because he only wants to sleep in his own bed. So we will be making an insane trip with no extra time to chill out before coming back home again the same day. We could easily stay with friends and rest that night before being back on the road Sunday morning and home in plenty of time but he's not having it.

And, did I mention his car has no passenger-side air bag? It's been recalled for years now with this flaw and he refuses to inconvenience himself by taking it in to have the airbag replaced for free.

I know I complain too much. Gotta work on that. I must be more optimistic.
Good side is my partner wants to be with me for the memorial service and I'll be buying a new car soon. And there are fireflies tonight in the back yard.

romance

I want passion in my life.
I want art and creativity in my life.
I want romance, which is the natural by-product of passion and art in my life.